When I first think of dreams I immediatly connect it to stars, galaxy and universe.
So I want to have a background all starry and all but due to my lack of artistic skills I have no idea how to :(
Your own personal moon.
Today was pretty alright considering I was very hm, not normal last night. I just felt that I was slowly drifting, getting replaced and I just couldn't be bothered fixing it. I just wanted everything to be right and I wouldn't have to make it perfect again.
Sometimes when you treasure something that you have with someone, it somehow becomes first priority. But then you never know if its first priority for them. When you realise that it doesn't seem as special and rather insignificant compared to their other relationships, you feel wasted. You feel as if you appreciate something that shouldn't even be there.
I felt like I was holding onto something that was slowly drowning on the other side.....
Well I got over it.
But theres still remains.
I got lots of butterflies in my stomach today. "He thinks your avoiding him" All throughout history, that was all I could think about. Who cares about post WWI in Australia or the moral decline of the 1920's. Fitzgerald made it obvious in The Great Gatsby the life in 20's everywhere was pretty decaying so meh. All that dominated my mind was the thought that he actually notices. I kept on deconstructing it and over analysing it but it never lost its meaning. I suppose it is kind-of sad that I care so much. But if I didn't care that'd be even sadder. In a self-fish kind of way, it made me happy in a way :) Haha, all for the wrong reasons. I implanted a plan in my brain after last Friday that it would be awkward if I started talking to him all of a sudden. So I was like "it makes no difference to him if I don't talk to him so meh!" But he actually noticed.....
:)
Annie is listening to Emiliana Torrinni
and is working on her literature oral
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